All is Fair in Love and war
by marksandsparks
Summary: Magnus and Alec fall into a forbiden love. As war beckons secrets are kept and lies build. What will happen when this falls apart?
1. Chapter 1

**This is the beginning of a multi chapter- I'm thinking between 10 and 15 but that might change to be more or less… ummm cuz it's the first chapter not too much plot but… more later.** **So... okay i was going to tell you something but got distracted by my letters changing color and not being able to switch them back... Am i insane? they are a different color right? Oh ya! i dont own anyone but im asking for christmas :P Also if this chap is at all boring im sorry. Had to set the stor which equals lotta discriptions.**

Chapter one (Alec POV)

I darted from my current position to the dark shadow being cast by the next tree. Making it to the concealment of semi darkness safely, I relaxed and scanned the clearing in front of me for the beautiful green eyes I had agreed to tackle this task for. Of course my father didn't know that was why I had done so. He, King Robert, truly believes I do this because of my beliefs on the topic of the 'cruel' and 'ungrateful' species that dwell in these woods directly outside of the kingdom. As far as he knew i spent these hours patrolling and spying.

My actual thoughts on the subject were along the same line as my sisters. First, they had nothing to be grateful for. Even though these creatures thrived in this, the Idris forest long before our people existed, our father believes that they are privileged because we allowed them to continue living after we chopped their home to make room for a great city. Now he wonders why the perimeter is so over populated by the forest folk. Denying it had anything to do with the loss of room when the city was built, King Robert insists they are taking advantage of our kindness and mercy.

I saw one of the elven people heading toward the tree I was sheltering under. I knew I couldn't be seen when in the shadows, but that didn't mean I couldn't be run into. I carefully backpedaled and pressed myself against the trunk, allowing her to pass unknowingly.

Every Nephlim had their own different ability. I was a Shadowhunter, and I was impossible to see in the shadows when I wanted to be. My siblings each had their own. Jace was a morphite, he could change temporarily into a lion, and Isabelle was a charmer. Almost everyone immediately liked her, which led to many boyfriends, and when she wanted she was able to up the power and get others to do what she wanted. Other beings had ability's too, but not many. Only very few of the other species had abilities.

The next of many things we disagree about is the thoughts of the people on the subject. I know they dislike us as much as my father dislikes them, but they have much better reason. Their ancient tribes have known this as their peaceful abode for century's and now there are minority's invading and destroying and stealing fertile land that is rightfully theirs. The beliefs of the king are focussed on all beings worshipping him and waiting patiently for their chance to be called on and being allowed to please his majesty.

I snorted in disgust at the thought. Quickly silencing myself I swept my gaze over the clearing, dreading someone had heard and would be making their way over to investigate. Thankfully the noise had gone unnoticed.

As I was thinking about returning home, and reporting absolutely nothing, I saw the familiar tall, slim figure, with partially spiked black hair. Yes. He was the reason I continued risking my life as a 'spy' for my father. Continued pretending to come out here and take notes on the 'evil plans' of the forest beings. Continued bringing back false reports that consisted of whatever would make him happy. The reason I considered the order two years ago to spy on these people, and spend hours everyday standing and watching as a blessing in disguise. When I began the job it was only going to be for a fortnight, but on my second patrol I had glimpsed the beautiful eyes, and heard the charming laugh that I instantly fell head over heels for. That night I had upped my acting and 'confessed' feeling good about doing my part for the cause. I begged my father to allow me to continue.

"Magnus!" another elfin man yelled. He turned around, and looked toward the voice with his shining cat eyes. So that was his name. Magnus.

Magnus's eyes flicked around, attempting to pinpoint the owner of the voice. As the green feline eyes swept past me I could have sworn they paused. He smiled. Was he smiling at me? He couldn't be. He couldn't know I was here-see me.

Magnus identified his caller and jogged over. He grinned at the other handsome elfin man. I felt a wave of jealousy. Was something going on there? Was that man unknowingly taking my love from me and claiming him as his own?

I mentally chastised myself for even feeling anything. Why did I so desperately want what I could never have? Relationships out of the species were unheard of. Even if that wasn't true, although the elves supported it, the Nephlim were strongly against same sex relationships.

All but a few people had retreated to their brush shelters, and logic told me there was no safer time to leave. I strolled to the very edge of the shadow before sprinting to the next. I continued this until I was far from the small village, after I was a safe distance away it was safe enough to walk as long as I stayed alert. I made it home well before sunset, and headed toward the field where we practiced with weapons. All of my siblings were forced by my father to perfect one kind of weaponry as well as martial arts in preparation for the possible war against the forest folk. He was convinced they were going to attack us. The weapon I had chosen was the bow and arrow. Isabelle had a whip she kicked ass with, and Jace specialized in throwing knives. Max was too young to begin training.

By the time I retrieved my equipment and walked to the field Isabelle and Jace were already there. When they looked up I nodded in greeting and loaded my bow.

* * * *

(Magnus POV)

I walked out into the clearing, looking for something to do. Almost as soon as I appeared I heard my name and I identified my best friend Ragner's voice. Spinning around I allowed my eyes to scan the undergrowth for the Shadowhunter I had grown fond of. I saw him under the protection of a tree. He wasn't as protected as he probably wished he was though. I was unaffected by powers effecting the eyes and mind. He of course stared at me sweetly, like he always did. I doubted he would show that emotion if he knew I was watching. I could sense longing, and I couldn't blame him. With my charming looks I'm hard to resist. On a deeper level though, I wanted him too. I didn't know why, but I was drawn to him. It was more than his beautiful face and muscular build too.

I looked away and went to Ragner. He didn't know I could see him and I wanted to keep it that way for now. Being one of the few elves with powers had its advantages. Even more so if you kept it as a secret weapon. For it to be that, it had to be a secret. I also don't think either he, or the other elves would react well to me walking over and conversing. I had to find a way to get him though.

As I got to Ragner a plan began forming in my head. I couldn't help but grin in anticipation. 

**Post note time! Like everyone i luv reviews and if you post stuff you know reviews and favorites and follows do motivate us. My rule is i will post once a week no matter how far i am... not just posting when im done with each chapter. All ready done with 5 chapters and this is the deal. I will post more quickly if i get a significant number of reviews ect. Hope u likey so far.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Firstly- thank you all followers, faveoriters, reviewers, and anyone who read the story. This chapter is a little shorter than the last one but hopefully its not as boring as I feel the last one probably was with all the background stuff. I also just wanted to say that in this story they don't have electricity and mdern things like phones and before this story I had no idea how hard it was to write without the times. I keep wanting to write the time or be like 'a couple minutes later'. It just dawned on me that you probably don't care so…I DON'T OWN! Enjoy… or don't…**

Chapter 2 (Alec POV)

I left for Idris forest closer to dawn than I normally did. By the time I left the city and reached the perimeter of the woods the sun was still very low in the amber sky. After standing for a moment to listen, and look for possible danger, I jogged to the first protruding shadow. Because of the time, many shadows were drawn out, long and slim, making it possible to walk three or four times farther without leaving the cover. I reached the village much quicker than I normally would have, and settled under a tree a little ways outside the main village. From this vantage point I could still see everything, but there was a much slimmer chance I would be bumped, and discovered that way.

As I waited in silence I watched the small village stir. First the hunters appeared, and left. A little while later the different residents woke, and stepped from their shelters into the crisp morning air. An elfin woman started a large fire in the clearing surrounded by the brush homes. Soon after Magnus appeared.

He scanned his surroundings and again his gaze seemed to linger on me. I knew it had to be my imagination. Nobody could see me when I didn't want to be seen. The man I recognized from the day before emerged and greeted Magnus. Although I despised him for stupid reasons, like getting Magnus's attention, I mentally thanked him for revealing the name of the man for whom I risked so much. I listened hard and caught bits and pieces of their conversation. The man said something along the lines of getting breakfast walked away, before quickly returning with fruit.

Magnus thanked him, and I heard him say Ragnor. That must be the name of his friend. As they indulged I allowed my gaze to wander, taking in the beauty of the village coming alive.

As my eyes instinctively went back to Magnus I saw the two had finished eating. I strained my ears in time to hear Magnus explaining his plans to go for a walk. When Ragnor offered to join him he was turned down for the sake of 'solitary therapy'. Ragnor was obviously confused but agreed to his friend's wishes and went to converse with an elderly looking lady.

When he was gone Magnus smiled. He turned around and looked right at me. My head spun around. There must be someone, or something behind me. I didn't see anything out of the ordinary. I flipped back to see him now walking toward me. It was a coincidence that he came this way. It really was quite beautiful. He probably preferred the scenery this direction. As he neared I was thankful that some shadows still merged and I was able to slip from the cover of one tree to another.

Now I was almost sure Magnus was following me. Maybe he saw me coming earlier and is angry. But he didn't look mad... He looked... Nervous and kind of happy.

I realized despairingly that I had run out of shadows that met. We were now far from the village, and hidden by shrubbery. I debated my options. Risk being seen for sure and jump to the next shadow, sprint home, or stay still and hope this was all coincidence. If I ran home or jumped the shadow he would see me. If he knew I was spying he would tell others, and that would lead to war. Okay... I pressed myself against the trunk and tried to manage the volume of my breathing.

He was still looking at me- almost kindly. Now that I had stopped he slowed down and approached slowly like you might a lost pet. "I can see you."

(Magnus POV)

The first thing I did after entering the clearing was look for the one who watched me. Even though we hadn't met or talked I was drawn to him. The blue of his eyes was the first thing I saw. They stood out in stark contrast to the surrounding deep greens and browns.

I excitedly found Ragnor and ate with him, before explaining what the reason of my absence would be. He took to long to leave, and by the time I was alone the longing to be with the boy was almost too much to handle.

I turned to where I could see him, and ditched all attempt to keep my sight secret. I stared straight at him, and watched as he tried to decipher whether or not it was him I was looking at. He frantically began scrabbling away, staying in the shadows cast by the forests large trees. He should know by now the cover does nothing for him when he's trying to hide from me.

The adorable boy retreated farther into the woods, until he trapped himself inside a closed of shadow. As he panicked and practically smashed himself against the trunk I felt bad for causing him so much fear. If only he knew I didn't want to hurt him. I slowed my pace dramatically and thinking of nothing better to do, I said in the most calming voice I could manage, "I can see you." His eyes doubled their size and he gasped. At that point I wanted nothing more than for him to look at me with the longing and admiration he did when he believed he was hidden. Why does everyone try so hard to hide their feelings?

Well, I reasoned. I planned on doing so at least for a while with this boy. If I flung myself at him and told him I loved him and wanted to have sex, I doubted it would go well.

**Alright so… review and tell me what you think. If I get lots of reviews ill update faster! I have already started chap 6 but not more often than once a week unless i get a good amount! Pweez? If it means anything faveorites, follows and REVIEWS! make me happy… :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**I know. Im a horrible person. Posting two days late… you know maybe I shouldn't mention that. Even if anyone really cares either way I doubt they would notice until I mention it… anyway. After this I plan to go back to the old schedule and because this was two days late the next will be two days early and BACK ON SCHEDULE! Yay! Two more things before chapter. 1: disclaimer. We all know how it goes. Blah blah blah don't own blah blah blah wish I did blah. And then also plot officially starts now. Kind of. And I think if I don't read for a while I know I forget what happened and theres a short review thing. Im gonna do that. Tell me if you like it or not so I know whether enough to continue in future.**

Chapter 3

The boy looked up at me, confused, and scared, and... Hopeful. _Hopeful?_ I thought back to all the times he was staring at me, with that look in his eyes.

"No you can't." he said dumbly.

I stepped closer so I was right next to him. "Yes, I can."

He just shook his head in disbelief and seemed to try to push himself further into the tree. I put my hand on his shoulder, in what I hoped was a comforting way but the boy just flinched away.

"Don't hurt me. I'm sorry for spying on you. My father made me and..." he paused, and then changed the direction of where he was going with his words. "Please don't tell the forest folk about me. I don't want a war to start. I don't want either of our people to die." Even though the topic was serious I found myself having trouble focusing. There was defiantly something different about him. I normally focused on looks and went for one night stands but I found myself not caring as much about his looks, and already feeling like I had known him a long time. Not that he wasn't good looking. He was sexy without even trying. And now I was jealous of that. I try so hard to stay looking as hot as I do. _Don't mean to sound conceded... What were we talking about?_ Oh ya, I should comfort him.

"Shhhh. It's okay." I said. "I don't want a war either and I don't want anyone to hurt you, or even know about you. You will be my little secret."

He looked at me and I realized how creepy and seductive that must have sounded. Desperate to say something else to distract him I added, "And I know a thing or two about bad parenting." I immediately regretted it. _Please don't ask. Please don't ask._

"So, what are you going to do now?" I felt relief wash through me when he didn't question the parent comment.

Hmmm. What did I plan to do? I smiled to myself. "What do you mean?"

"Well," he said shyly." Are you going to yell at me, or chase me out of the forest, or kill me..."

I gasped. "I would never! Let's start like this. I'm Magnus Bane. An elf, with average social standing."

He nodded. "I know." Then he suddenly looked like he wanted to take it back. "I mean I'm not like stalking you or anything I just watch you and listen to your conversations!" He was digging his whole deeper and deeper. " No I mean I don't do that, I..."

I shushed him. "It's alright darling, I don't mind." he looked taken aback by the word choice. I quickly continued, "So what's your name?"

Following the format of my introduction he said, "I'm Alec Lightwood, prince of Nephlim City."

I bowed mockingly, trying to lighten the mood. "I had no idea I was in the presence of royalty."

"I know I don't look like much..." Alec said blushing.

I leaned in planning on kissing him, but that would defiantly scare him away, so instead I stopped about an inch from his face and said, "Well I'm sure you have things to attend to." I said trying to finalize the encounter. As much as I didn't want him to leave I knew I had to take things slowly. And being so close to the adorable, shorter man it was hard to resist ravishing him. 

"Yeah," he said uncomfortably. "I'm sorry, I won't come back.

"No don't do that Alec. I don't get many chances to get to know someone as cute as you." I felt accomplished when he blushed again. Damn that was adorable. "Why don't you just meet me here tomorrow at sun high."

"I don't know- the only reason I came out here was because my father made me, I could just tell him it's too dangerous..."

"Don't lie to yourself Hun, we both know that's not true. If you honestly don't want to..." I paused so he knew I meant something more graphic than I said. "Get to know me..."

He blushed again, even more deeply. Then Alec slipped past me and ran toward the city.

(Alec POV)

As soon as I couldn't see Magnus any more I slowed to a walk so I could think about what happened.

He almost seemed like he was into me to. Who am I kidding, he defiantly did. When I looked at him...

I thought back. _My heart was beating fast and hard, but now I don't think it was from fear. At one point I could have sworn he was going to kiss me... No I probably imagined that. Then again, I also thought I imagined him looking at me..._

Why do I have to feel so strongly about something that's _so_ _wrong?_

The only thing I knew for sure was that I was going back tomorrow. I needed to see Magnus again.

**I know the chapter was bumpy. And short. Defiantly not one of my faves. The next one is pretty long I think. If anybody cares my official excuse is two hour per day school soccer team tryouts eating up all the extra time I never had. I barley have time to post and like NONE to write. Ugh. Glad I was ahead. As always if y'all want quicker posts review! Or review just to be nice. That's always an option.**


	4. Chapter 4

**I don't own mag or alec. Don't have much to say… enjoy.**

Review- Why do I feel so strongly about something that was so wrong?

The only thing I knew for sure was that I was going back tomorrow. I had to see Magnus again.

Chapter 4 (Alec POV)

I ran out of our large home. I kept my head angled downward until I was far from civilization. If anyone saw my face, which I was sure must be shining with nervousness and excitement, they would be sure to question. _'Why is he grinning so broadly on the way to that boring chore his father calls a job?'_

As I neared the forest I prepared for the sting in my calves and tightness in my chest that always came when I ran such a distance. The first of the tall oaks loomed in the horizon ahead. With the three percent of brain power I could take away from thinking of Magnus I pondered the reason the cramp that had become practically tradition when sprinting places disappeared. I redirected this attention to the spot under the bottom right of my ribcage where it always started. Nope, no pain. Maybe the adrenaline chased it away.

A few yards past the tree line I came to a halt. As I steadied my labored breath I let more of the focus on the astonishing elf slip away, so I could allow my senses wander and pick up any signs of danger.

I started up again, but slowed my pace dramatically, so it was now just a walk. If I continued to run as I had been before I would have been more than a little early. Heck, even now if I walked the rest of the way, when I factored in the run, I would still arrive with plenty of time to spare. I didn't want to make Magnus think I was too eager. When he arrived I could always lie, and tell him I hadn't been waiting long, but somehow I doubted he would buy it.

In two shakes of a lambs tail I was back underneath the shade of the tree where we conversed the day prior. (I still had to hide from other forest creatures) I ungracefully dropped onto my ass, and leaned against the tree, anxiously waiting.

(Magnus POV)

I stared down at my thumbs again, and twiddled them, desperate for something to distract me as the time slowly passed. Just a moment ago I had walked out of my humble abode to gage the distance the sun had moved. Barley at all, I realized sighing. How slowly time went when you anticipated something so greatly. _Don't get your hopes up!_ I kept internally scolding myself. _He may not even come to meet you._ Even though I tried so hard to stop it the same images came back. Alec and I were in some secluded place, known of only by us. We were rolling in each other's arms, sweating, and moaning, and...

_Now stop right there, Magnus my boy!_ My mind tried to reason once again. I hated it when sense kicked in. Retreating to fantasies was a good pass-time. _Even if he does come,_ my common sense argued, _it may not be in peace. And even if it is in peace, you don't even know if he's gay._ I knew all these things may be the case, but I couldn't stop the hope that crept through my hard, unrevealing exterior.

After painful waiting that dragged on to feel at least twenty times worse than it actually was, I decided it was time to go- or a little past time to go technically. And to think I almost caved and opted out of being fashionably late.

(Alec POV)

I sat and stared in the direction I knew Magnus would be coming from. It was a while past when we were supposed to meet. Maybe he decided I wasn't worth it, I thought glumly. Or he could have forgotten, or gotten hurt. The thought struck me and caused a lot more emotion than it should have toward a man I just met.

I felt my stomach rumble and decided that if he wasn't going to show up it wouldn't help anything for me to starve. Just as I began to rise, an object appeared in my peripheral vision.

My head snapped so quickly it hurt. I undoubtedly recognized the frame, regardless of the shadow that shrouded and blurred his image. He strode into the clearing, with a demeanor as calm and composed as I hoped mine was, but seriously doubted. He had seen me too and altered his direction slightly to more accurately arrive next too me.

After a couple of seconds he accomplished this by coming to a halt about three feet in front of me. Without saying anything he pointedly he crossed his ankles and lowered himself gracefully into a cross legged sitting position. I followed suit by sliding my back down the tree trunk behind me to end with my knees bent in front of me.

I felt my stomach flutter and my face heat up as an effect of seeing him and of knowing he could see me.

"Hello." The casual, unaffected tone in Magnus's voice surprised me. I knew I would sound nothing like that if I were to speak. The nonchalant attitude was hard to control when he was meeting someone secretly. Someone if he was known to have associations with would turn him into an outcast. Also- in my case- my voice would be shaky because of the foreign excitement of being close to the attractive man I had been practically stalking.

"Uh...hi." I said lamely.

Magnus smiled at me warmly anyway and continued, " So, wacha wanna do?"

"Do?" Oh my god I was digging deeper and deeper. My face heated further and I became embarrassed of the obvious fact I was blushing.

His grin grew wider and cocky. "Well do means to get done, or carry out, or preform an action. Possibly in the way of flowers, or hair, it could mean to arrange nicely. Although if your mind is going down a different path, and you wanted to do someone rather than something-"

"I understand." I cut in quickly. Damn. I swear I could feel the red on my face become darker. _Just keep that metaphorical shovel scooping Alec, and soon you'll be buried alive.  
><em>  
>Magnus leaned forward and I froze. I could feel his breath by my ear. "You're cute when you blush." If my face could have gotten any darker it would have. I sat stiffly while he chuckled at my reaction to something so minorly suggestive. I desperately tried to act calmer. At least Magnus didn't seem to mind. He was amused by me; and I didn't know whether to be glad for that or not. Who would have known? After digging and digging you ended with a hole impossible to climb out of. And all the while there is someone laughing at your mistakes.<p>

That was the thing though. Magnus wasn't laughing in a cruel or mocking way. The way his gaze held on me reminded me of someone watching a puppy comically run into a wall. I was a silly little boy who he enjoyed watching squirm in discomfort.

**Originally this and the next chapter were going to be one but it was really long and im not very far ahead with the writing anymore so I split them. I apologize if the end of this chap or the beginning of the next is weird. I hadn't originally planned to have them like that. Review?**


	5. Chapter 5

**This chapter is for mudkipluvr4ever… sorry if I got your name wrong. The only one that has reviewed every chapter and the only one who reviewed chap 4. Thanks! It is also of course for everyone else that reviewed, faved, alerted, or read. Again I apologize for the awkward beginning. It wasn't supposed to be its own chap. When we left off Mag and Alec were meeting for the first planned time. ****Alec of course was being nervous and adorable and magnus of course was bbeing confidant and sexy.**

I decided to return to the previous subject. "What do you think we should do? You know the forest much better."

His response surprised me. "Actually now that you have me thinking about it I really don't, I've never been far from the village. Nobody ever really goes other places- unless it's to the city on legal business."

"Oh..."

"We could explore!" Magnus exclaimed sounding like an excited child.

"Sure, that sounds fun." I quickly agreed. His enthusiasm was contagious. It made me temporary forget I had just met him, and what trouble I would get into if I wasn't careful enough about keeping this unknown to all others, and making sure Magnus did the same. After raising to his feet, this man, hardly more than a stranger, offered me his hand in a very old fashion manner. I accepted and was quickly yanked to my feet.

As he began to pull away his hand I tightened my grip reflexively, not wanting the warmth and comfort to leave. He looked back at me, and we stood awkwardly. Despite the situation I couldn't help but notice the tingles that pricked my whole arm, emanating from all places our skin was in contact. I began to apologize and drop his captive limb but he smiled and rose a finger from the other hand to my mouth shushing me. He shifted our hands so that the fingers twined together. "It's fine."

As much as I wanted to agree I knew how wrong it was. " No. Magnus I can't..."

"Oh," he murmured. "…so your not gay? My apologies. I thought you may have had different intentions when you came to meet me." He dropped my arm and looked down.

I was taken aback by how he had managed to figure out my exact intentions, even though he currently believed those observations to be wrong. I had never planned on him to know my feelings, or the fact that the relationship I wanted was so...

You don't even know him! But he was exactly right and I found myself wanting to tell him so. Never in my wildest dreams did I admit these feelings. We would just speak once and forget about it, but now I had agreed stupidly to explore with him, and my stupid hand didn't want to leave his. Now it was alone and cold by my side, and in a reckless manner I decided it would be worth at least admitting something to him.

"No... I... Am..." Damn! I just gave my biggest secret to a man I just met! "And I do want to... Get to know you better." Shut up mouth! "I can't though. I can't be gay, and I can't know you. And I especially can't mix the two. I'm the prince of the city and if I were to go against its two biggest beliefs..." I trailed off.

Magnus raised his arm and let one finger tip brush against mine. I swear I saw a spark. The skin tingled and burned in the most pleasant way ever after the contact. "Do you feel that?"

I almost asked what he meant, but I knew, and so did he. "Yes."

He nodded. "Alright, let's explore."

I gratefully accepted the change of subject and bobbed my head.

(Magnus POV)

After wandering for a good amount of time we came across the most amazing thing. There was a clearing with a small lake- really a pond, and a couple large rocks that were at least ten feet tall. The two of us clambered to the top of one and pointedly talked about unimportant things, like food preference and a little about our different cultures. We continued chatting easily until the sun was setting.

"Alec. Look how pretty it is." I said pointing at the sunset.

He raised himself onto an elbow and followed my finger. His eyebrows shot up. "Shit! Magnus I have to go! I've never been gone this long! Everyone will be worried! How am I going to explain this?"

I flinched at his sudden outburst. "Sorry." he breathed quickly. "I know it's sudden, but I have to leave now."

"It's fine." he slid of the rock, and I watched him run toward the forest. "Alec wait!" He stopped and turned as I dropped and began jogging after him.

"Yes?" he questioned.

"Bye." he lifted a hand and smiled, and before he could turn away again I grabbed his shoulders and bent to quickly kiss his slightly parted lips. His eyes widened and he gasped.

I waited for a reaction, but he didn't say anything so I did. "See you tomorrow?" he nodded, still shocked. "Do you want to meet here?" Another nod. "Alright."

He turned and jogged away. As soon as the boy was out of sight I touched my lips. The pleasant burning sensation lingered. I could get used to that.

(Alec POV)

When I got home my calves were burning and my breath was coming in short gasps. Isabelle walked out to see me. She was grinning. Izzy was the only one who knew I was gay before and now she was the only one that knew about Magnus. "So, why were you gone so long?" she asked teasingly. Knowing her mind she probably thought we had sex or something.

I decided to tease her and said jokingly back, "Oh the centaurs are making weapons and planning to start a war. No biggie."

Just then my father decided to walk up. "THEY WHAT!"

I spun around. The options I had flashed through my mind. I could act like what I had just said was true or tell him I was joking. If I said I was joking more questions would be to come like why I was out so late and maybe I wouldn't be able to see Magnus again.

In a mixture of lack to plan my answer and the horrible reality of the situation I said. "Yes, they did. I think the forest creatures want to start a war."

Isabelle looked at me in horror. I processed the result of me saying that was and my stomach dropped. We both knew father would send troops out, and despite what he thought the forest creatures would be unprepared. All the defenseless creatures... The defenseless Magnus would be left to their mercy.

**And the plot thickens! Dun Dun Duhhhhh! At least the title starts to mmake a little more sense now… Please review. You could do it for the possibility of early posting, (btw sry this was a day late if any1 keeps trac) to be a nice person, to correct something, to say you like/luv/hate it, or any combo of the previously mentioned.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Okay got a much longer chapter than normal for you guys. I was going to split this one too but couldn't find a good place. I don't own any of the characters we have so much fun with.**

Chapter 6 (Alec POV)

I sat in my room, head in hands, unmoving. I had been in this position since my father had excused me, but that only came after a tsunami of questions.

_"Tell me everything Alexander!" he demanded. I squirmed under his glare._

_I poured out lies, carefully constructing a story I hoped wouldn't fall apart. "Well I was actually on my way back home when I came across about twenty of them in a thicker patch of trees. Luckily I saw the mob before any of them saw me. After concealing myself in a shadow I listened in and what I heard surprised me..." I blabbered on until the sun had halfway disappeared. "...They left soon after that, but I stayed hidden a little while longer to be safe."_

_My father seemed to ponder this for a while, and I desperately hoped I hadn't slipped and stated something, contradicting myself. His eyes moved from a tree in the distance he had been studying back to my face. "Look at me Alexander." he said seriously. "Your job is now more important than ever, but with great power comes great responsibilities." I oddly thought that what he said had the potential to be a famous quote in a different place and time. "You will continue spying in the forest, but now only the two of us will know. The rest of the citizens will be falsely informed that you have stopped, so you will have to hide from them on your way there and back also. I am going to have armor made for you before tomorrow and I expect it to be worn. I don't want you to die." I hopefully blinked at him. My father had never told me or my siblings he cared for us... Would he actually mind if I died? "If you did I wouldn't have an inside view of the enemy." Oh..._

_"Yes sir, I will."_

_"Be extra careful the day after tomorrow. Once the soldiers are out there they will just be more people to hide from. If movement is detected hesitation is unlikely."_

_I knew this shouldn't have shocked me but, "What! Why would soldiers be in the woods?"_

_He looked down at me concerned. "You said they wanted a war and were making weapons. We can't stand by and wait."_

_I flinched at how stern and sure his voice was. "Maybe..." I began stuttering. "Ma-Maybe they'll change their minds." That sounded so stupid. "Or it could have been a rehearsal for a play or something." Not better._

_"Son you should go inside and sleep. I think the stress has gotten to you."_

_I protested and he came back with something about being in the sun longer than I should. Great now he thought I was crazy._

I looked up lazily at a knock on the door. I didn't say anything, just waited. Isabelle was the only one I was okay with talking to right now because she was the only one who understood my predicament, and she would come in anyway.

Sure enough the door opened and a sweaty Isabelle shuffled in. I had forgotten. Training. Oh well. I wouldn't be fighting in the battles with no reason. I would be hiding, watching frightened from the shade of a tree, knowing every death I witnessed was my doing.

I allowed my head to fall back into my hands. I knew Isabelle was mad at me. No, that wasn't the right word maybe surprised, in a very bad way, or frustrated, or disappointed, or all of those combined. I also knew she wouldn't say so. She knew I had recognized my mistake and felt horrible for it. She wouldn't rub it in because when she wasn't proving a point about attitude in public she was kind and caring towards the ones she loved, and I knew I was one of those select few.

I felt her staring at me. After a moment of uncomfortable silence I heard footsteps and felt the bed bounce as she plopped down next to me.

"Alec, it's not your fault."

I laughed. Sometimes it's all I can do to hide the tears. "Don't lie to me Isabelle." I fell back on the bed wanting to look at her but not having the energy to sit up properly. Now I could see her sad eyes. Eyes that were unintentionally shooting daggers. I didn't want pity. I would prefer to be yelled at. That's what I deserved.

Isabelle didn't seem to be able to think of something to say back. She didn't even negate the fact she was lying. She leaned back so she was lying next to me.

We stared at the ceiling for what must have been half the night, the only thing audible was the steady breathing. As I listened it became jerky. I turned my head to look at her and watched as tears screamed down her cheeks. Just watched. "So many of them are going to die Alec."

I shifted back to look at the ceiling so Izzy wouldn't be able to witness my bottom eyelids pooling, and overflowing when I blinked.

After a while the choked breaths became normal again. As the sun peeked over the horizon Isabelle got up to leave. I grabbed her arm and she turned back giving me a cursory glance. "Thank you." I whispered. She smiled halfheartedly and left.

* * * *

I left early to meet Magnus. He wouldn't be there but this way it would be easier to be unnoticed by citizens, and siting and waiting in the forest wouldn't be any worse than sitting in my room and waiting.

I climbed up onto the same rock. I noticed it was hallowed out shallowly. With mild interest I figured out that from the ground if someone was lying down in it they wouldn't be seen. Good, now I can wait here and not be seen instead of down in the dirt under a tree.

After such a long time sitting in my room it was difficult for me to guess how long I had been waiting, but from my vantage point it wasn't difficult to find the sun. It was warm today. To warm for most peoples liking but honestly I much preferred this weather over the cold. I was glad my father wouldn't force me into the armor until tomorrow. The radiating heat of that might have been too much.

The waiting blurred together as the sun baked my skin. Without meaning to the warm surface and slapping of water on rock and rustling of the trees cleared my mind and the guilty weight was lifted off my shoulders.

My bliss was disturbed who knows how much later by angry murmuring. It was close by, at the bottom of the rock. I scooted as close as I dared to the edge and listened.

"Damn it! He didn't come! I could have sworn he liked me too!" It was Magnus I realized. Why was he talking to himself? Was it about me? I was preparing to announce my presence when he continued. "That stupid boy. I shouldn't care about him! The first time in my pathetic life I actually care for someone and it's this. It's so wrong! Why someone I should never have fooled myself into thinking I could be with."

After he finished I looked over, attaching a fake grin to my face, acting like I hadn't been listening. And hadn't caused a war... "Hey, Magnus! I thought I heard someone!"

He jumped a little and then looked up with his own fake happy expression. "Hey, I didn't see you." Magnus rolled onto his feet. Hmmm, he wasn't standing. I wonder how long he's been there. As he started the climb the face of the rock I tilted my head back and squinted at the sun. I let out a thankful breath when I noticed it was only a little past our meeting time. Good, he hadn't waited long.

Once Magnus had heaved himself up onto the boulder I laid back down and let the sun warm me. I didn't even think about Magnus hurting me despite the fact I just met him. Why do I trust him so much. I glanced at him quickly and saw that the slim man was examining the water below us thoughtfully. My eyes drooped shut but I could still see him on the backs of my lids.

(Magnus POV)

From on top of the rock it became obvious how small the pond really was. Probably close to the size of... Well what could I compare it to... Maybe six or seven of me lying down by nine or ten of me lying down? I found myself wondering how deep it was and whether or not I would hurt myself jumping in from the top of this rock.

When I finally turned back after my speculation I saw Alec sprawled out with his legs relatively straight but his arms perpendicular to his body. I couldn't help but imagine him in this position somewhere else. I doubted his face would be so peaceful, and probably less clothing. Then I could finally see that body of his, which I'm sure would be gorgeous.

But now it was innocent, and he looked so relaxed and unsuspecting. I practically drifted toward him, making almost no noise at all, and the drags of my feet that were audible could be easily mistaken for the song of the trees. Once I was right next to him I squatted slowly hoping my knees wouldn't crack. He hadn't shown any signs of noticing my presence yet, but the more time I wasted the less likely it was that would remain true.

Stiffly I allowed my butt to touch the hot surface of the rock and held back a sigh of relief as the stress was taken off my thighs. My legs were still uncomfortable and cramping though. I kept my knees bent and tucked close to my chest because I knew if I were to straighten them my legs would most defiantly brush Alec's. Then after steadily lowering my torso so that my head floated as close to his bicep as it could without my hair giving me away I prepared for this last step. If I dropped my head onto his arm I would hurt him, but if I went slow Alec would feel my hair and move. I began quickly lowering my head, and let out a breath while doing so, hoping the small amount of warning would be sufficient. Right before my skull smashed into his arm I pulled back dramatically so that the impact was soft.

I studied his face waiting for his reaction and was rewarded when the boy's eyes shot open. Then noticing it was me he froze. I could imagine the gears turning in his mind trying to decide what to do. He didn't move or look at me, just continued to lie tensely and his eyes stayed open.

To try and get things back to normal- or as normal as they could be with this forbidden attraction- I said something that I hoped was along the lines of a normal conversation for him. "What happened when you got home yesterday? Didn't you say something about your family worrying?"

If anything this made it worse. "It was fine." he mumbled and then fell quite again.

Once I decided he wasn't going to speak again I took another shot. "So how's your family? Do you have any siblings?" Alec's reaction wasn't bad , but he didn't relax at all either.

"Uhhhhh, well..." he hesitated."My father is ummm... The king..."

"Wow that's great! I didn't know I had captured prince charming!" I exclaimed, even though I did know. He told me he was prince the first time we talked.

His cheeks tinted a little to an adorable pink. I loved his blush, and found it cute that it was so easy to bring it out. "Ya." he said unenthusiastically. "I don't really want to be though. You know, a lot of stress." After pausing again he seemed to lighten up a bit. "I do have three siblings though! Isabelle, Jace, and Max."

"Oh? And how old are they?" I encouraged.

"Jace and Isabelle are only a little bit younger than me- about a year, and Max is ten. Almost eleven."

"That's nice, can they fade in the shadows like you?"

" No, but Isabelle can get people to do what she wants, everyone likes her, and Jace can morph for about an hour a day into a lion. I don't really think it's done him anything yet, but is kinda cool. We don't know about Max yet, he's too young." I felt the tight muscles loosen up as he forgot he was supposed to be uncomfortable and I dared to edge close so we were now lying close enough for our sides to touch. I let my still bent knees slide down.

I didn't want to let him stop talking long enough to think about how close we are. "It sounds like you really love them."

"Defiantly. Jace and I train together all the time, and Isabelle's great. She's who I trust the most, who I can talk to, and Max is just adorable." His lips were pulled up at the corners now as he thought fondly of his family. His head dropped to the side so he could look at me. My stomach fluttered. Our faces were close enough I could feel his breath. It took all my self control not to climb onto his chest and kiss him again. "What about you? Anything goin' on with your family?"

Well that ruined the mood. Noticing the pained look on my face Alec began to take back his question but I put a finger to his lips and turned on my side to face him. I knew that if I wanted him to trust me I had to trust him. I prepared myself to explain my story for the first time in my life.

I slid my hand down his jaw and rested it on his chest. He looked at it strangely but didn't say anything. "First I should tell you my father doesn't have elven blood. He was actually a morphite like your brother, his animal was a crocodile. My mother had only half elf blood and didn't take the physical traits of one. So they both lived in the city, and according to what they told me it was love at first sight. When my mother learned how against elves my father was she decided just not to tell him of her elven heritage.

They got married and then after awhile had me. By a bout of bad luck I had taken the genes from my mother's elven side of the family. For the first couple years of my life my father wasn't around very much, and when he was he was wasted so he didn't notice. Then when I was about four he left to go to some war. My mother and I bonded in that time. She loved me and was kind. I grew really close to her.

Then when my father came back three years later he was sober. As he embraced my mother he saw me standing behind her. I could feel the happy atmosphere that came with being reunited slip away to be replaced with brief confusion and then anger. 'What is that?' My father demanded, not even referring to me as his son-or human. My mother looked up dazed as she was snapped out of the dreamy mood. I don't remember exactly what happened next."

I felt my chest tighten as it fought the sob that threatened to escape my throat. If I gave that one passage the others would demand freedom to, and I could not show weakness in front of anyone. I noticed I was full on cuddled into Alec now. One of my knees was bent over his thigh and I was turned sideways into him. The hand that was on his chest now rested on the stone on the opposite side of his body. The arm connecting it to my body was across his abdomen and I had been speaking into his neck. The boy defiantly didn't look comfortable but probably didn't have the heart to complain when I was in a flashback like this. I could tell he had sensed my lie about not remembering the next events and gratefully didn't pressure me into details I wasn't ready to give out.

(Alec POV)

I stayed silent during the pauses in Magnus's tale. I didn't want to have him feel obliged to continue, but also let the air stay empty so he could continue if he wanted. By the time he stopped after explaining the train station scene the elf was all but on top of me. It was a new experience and I wasn't fully adapted to it but hoped my presence comforted him. After all it wasn't unpleasant, just a quick step, like the kiss had been. In another situation I would have casually scooted away but the poor man didn't need any rejection today.

Magnus's exerted heat was intoxicating and I couldn't help but notice the natural leafy smell that had become his after years of forest life.

Soon I became accustom to our position and decided it would be proper to do something other than just... Well other than just lay flat like I was. I decided on bending the arm that was pinned at the shoulder by the elves head so that my hand rested securely in the small of his back and threw the other under my own cranium which had begun to ache from the long rest on the rock.

In encouraging response Magnus curled up a bit more and nuzzled his head into my neck reminding me of a cat. In the confidant haze that came with being so close to someone you cared about for the first time (well cared about in a different way then I cared about my siblings) I all but forgot the daunting war that was my doing and threatening to begin tomorrow.

Alright guys I gave you a chapter about three times as long as normal and I posted on time. If that doesn't deserve reviews idk what does. How about we play a game. Everyone against mudkipluvr4ever and Malec4ever. It was going to be just mudkip- but that would be too easy, even though mudkip- does have the same amount of reviews as everyone else combined... Thanks as always to all alert people and fave people and review people and readers. GAME ON!


	7. Chapter 7

…**. Im not gonna lie- I was disappointed with the single review for the 6 page chapter. I do appreciate the one I got though, as always mudkipluvr4ever. You now have more than everyone else combined. Im also mad at my phone because that's where I type the story and I was a few chapters ahead and they were pretty long and my stupid phone deleted all of it! Its annoying redoing chapters and knowing they are probably not as good as the first ones. Oh well…**

(Chapter 7) (Alec POV)

I forced my eyes open, fighting the figurative glue that held the lids together. In my exhausted state I noticed there was something different about my room but couldn't figure out what it was. The processing that led to the answer was broken by a clank of metal on metal. I rolled over quickly. It had sounded like it came from behind me in my room. I realized my mistake when my heart jumped at the unexpected sensation of falling. I cursed at my reflexes as my hip thudded on the wood floor. A startled breath was exhaled forcefully through my nose and came out something like nmmph. I hung my fingertips on the edge of my window sill and used my arms as well as my legs to stand. As I peered out the window still curious about the source of the sound. I realize what had been different at my waking was the lack of light that usually filtered through the windows. The sun wasn't even visible yet.

Another ding sound reverberated in the night. After squinting at the surrounding area I figured it must be coming from around the corner, out of view. Might as well figure out what it is... It's not like I'll be able to fall back asleep...

I walked out of my room and trudged down the hall rubbing my still sleepy eyes. After quietly passing the rooms of my siblings (it would be unfair to have them share my consciousness this early) and plopping down two flights of stairs- too tired to fight gravity- it wasn't far to the front doors. On my way down the first corridor I debated breakfast. When I reached the intersection I was faced with the options of left to the kitchen or right to the main entrance of the castle (going straight would get me nowhere but a rarely used side door).

I headed toward the kitchen. Not because of hunger. Somewhere in my head I was aware this decision was based on not being at all eager to step away from the warmth of my home into the cold morning air in nothing but my sleep clothes. I was procrastinating.

When I had passed through the foyer and into the kitchen instinct took over and my feet aimed themselves at the small room that usually contained the good snacks. I entered and took a quick inventory, trying to fool myself into believing I was really looking for something to eat. After one more cursory glance I gave up. With nothing better to do I continued on my quest- intent on conquering the source of my premature awakening.

From the kitchen it was much more sensible to use the back door instead of embarking on the long trek back to the double doors at the front of the house.

Before I was even outside the crisp air blew forcefully threw the now open door, immediately raising the hair on my arms. I crossed them, tightly hugging myself and shoved my fingers in my armpits.

Outside I could barley see the glow of light peeking from over the horizon past all of the carelessly lain out training equipment. I turned right- taking the quicker way around the castle. For no reason except the slight amusement it gave me I hopped onto the plank me and Jace or Izzy sparred on sometimes. It was nothing more than a strip of wood suspended by ropes that were attached to the branches of two trees, but it held countless memories. I grinned down at the scorch mark from six years ago. I felt bad for that boy. How was he to know that he was breaking Izzy's record of alway's being the dumper and never the dumpee? She set his arm on fire and chased him around with her whip. Luckily she wasn't very good with it yet. As he was running away he ran into this and set it on fire. He got away relatively unscathed... I think.

I was so wrapped up in that memory I almost forgot to step over the less worn spot that nobody wanted to touch since... Maybe I shouldn't relive that one. Let's suffice to say it involved Isabelle and another one of her boyfriends. Though how they managed to do that on a foot wide splintery piece of wood hanging in he air I've never known.

Without looking up I knew it was time to get off when I reached the deep scratches in the wood. In retrospect that was a good story, but when it happened it was terrifying. Jace got a little too into training and went lion on me with his morphite powers. He almost killed me!

I dropped onto the ground and jogged a few feet to make sure the plank wouldn't swing and hit me.

As I continued around the house, my arms still cradled around me trying to fend off the cold, I passed the side door. I guess I should have used it.

I realized I could hear the clanking again. I only half cared. If I was honest with myself I was only using this as a distraction so I wouldn't drive myself crazy thinking about Magnus and the danger I put him in when the troops go out tomorr-... today.

I staggered backwards a few steps as if someone had hit me. I stood shocked and blinked. Then I sprinted forward. Adrenaline pounded throughout my veins and anger, guilt, and worry boiled in my chest.

I burst into the clearing and glared around ready to challenge whoever came at me. I straightened up from my crouch and realized they wouldn't attack me. They had no idea I was there to try and stop them. I was the prince.

But no one seemed to even notice my presence. Of course! Right now the ground was one giant shadow right now without the sun. My frazzled mood must have triggered my powers.

Now that I had calmed- even it was just a little bit- I knew it was a good thing I hadn't been seen and questioned. What could I do? Nothing, especially without giving away the lie.

I bit my lip and regretfully bounded back to the side of the house. There had to be some way I could help. I considered barging into the clearing again when the sun was up with a distraction. That wouldn't keep them for long though, if at all.

I squeezed my my head with my hands in frustration and thudded it once against the wall. Think. Think. Think!

My automatic reaction was to hurt the soldiers. Then I thought about running out and warning Magnus. I couldn't just run into the elf village. They would think it was me that was attacking. It would make things worse, and if I waited in the forest he wouldn't go to our meeting place at the agreed upon time.

My lip split from the sudden pressure my teeth had put on it so I pulled them away to have them start grinding against each other. Then as much as I had been attempting to prevent it a frustrated tear slipped from my eye.

The clinks had gone from the annoying things that woke me up to a daunting promise of death. Death of innocent creatures whose blood would be on my hands. They would die because I was too cowardly to tell my family the truth. All those lives lost instead of mine when my father found out. And honestly I probably wouldn't be killed. I would probably just be banished, or grounded. Made to never see Magnus again. And that was the one that scared me.

It was selfish. He would find someone else if he never saw me again. Be perfectly happy.

I found my face streaked with tears when I reached up to wipe away what I thought had been just one.

Clink. Images flashed between a baby centaur crying over its mother to a mother crying over it's child.

Clink. A fairy flutter shocked in front of its families tree, helpless as it's family screamed.

Clink. Jace surrounded by creatures that I couldn't be mad at. They were defending themselves.

Clink. Isabelle hanging from the gallows- captured and killed for helping me.

Clink. Magnus cowering below a soldier Eyes wide with fear.

Clink. Magnus unmoving and grey, in row of other murdered elves.

I let the water pour freely from my eyes now. I wasn't sobbing. Just standing in silence watching the men prepare to head out.

The worst part was that I knew there was nothing I could do about it. I would have to sit and watch out of danger like the spoiled prince I was. Sit and imagine what was happening. Think of the most horrible outcome and convince myself it was real because for all I would know it could be. And I would-could- do nothing.

Clink. Me standing with blood spattered on my clothes and dripping from my hands. I turned slowly to see the ground around me covered with the body's of loved ones. People that I killed. I knew in a few weeks this may as well be reality. Not everyone who died would be killed directly by me, but if the footprints were traced back...

I smashed my head against the wall, harder this time. I needed something to distract me so the images left my head. Otherwise I knew they would quickly drive me insane.

Ya- so its getting a little more angsty… ummm but at least theres a bit more plot now. Maybe. So please tell me if u liked/ loved/ hated it, or if I made mistakes or what u think will/ should happen. I love all u guys that have reviewed and faved and alert and read. i might not post the next chap next mon, but if I don't I will be posting a one shot. Unless of course I get enough people asking me to post the next chap of this story instead…


	8. Chapter 8

Alright so I had to rewrite this chapter because my stupid phone deleted my work. Im still bummed about that especially because I feel like the original version of this chap was better. I was glad I got more reviews than normal guys. Incase anyone was wondering I have not gained the rights to tmi. Btw whole chap is isabelles pov

Chapter 8 (Isabelle POV)

I was awoken by a knock on my door and the familiar voice of my brother saying my name. I sat up abruptly ready to jump out of bed and run off somewhere or another if it was needed.

"What?" I asked. Alec apparently took that as an invitation to come in because he stepped inside and looked at me. Even when he noticed I was in nothing but underwear and a flimsy shirt he didn't leave or turn away. Not that I cared- he just usually would be embarrassed by that kind of thing.

His cheeks were red, but he wasn't blushing because of my attire. It looked like it could have been from the cold. That and his windswept hair suggested he had already been outside. Judging by his furrowed brow I guessed anger or frustration added to the color as well.

"What is it?" I questioned again. It didn't surprise me when Alec remained silent. He stepped over and like so many times before (most of which involved Magnus) Alec was face down and miserable on my bed. There was no need to press him into talking. I knew he would when he was ready.

I leaned back against the head of my bed, still tired. It must still be early. My brothers sobbing was audible now. I just waited. There was no need to pressure him. For a while he alternated mumbling and screaming into the quilts. The sounds were muffled, and I couldn't see his face because it was buried in the fabric.

I was glad I couldn't. I hated to see my brother like this. Magnus was doing him no good, he's more trouble than he's worth. Most of this was Alec's fault though. He is the single reason that our soldiers, and the inhabitants of the forest will be losing their lives. Because of his carelessness and lack of honesty. Alec has single handedly started a war.

After a particularly loud fit of shouting he drew back an arm and hit my bed, surprising me. I quickly pulled my feet back and tucked them close to me so they would be safe if my brother continued abusing my bed.

I wasn't mad at him. I wanted to be. I tried so hard to be angry, but I wasn't. Instead I felt bad for him because I knew he didn't mean it, and no matter how stupid it was, or how it would effect life as we know it or how much I wanted to- I couldn't hate him.

I continued to listen. After a while I finally made out one word he seemed to be repeating.

"Coward."

* * * *

I wiped away the dribble of water that had made its way down to my chin as  
>I hastily drank. Not wanting to continue training yet I sat on the splintery wooden bench at the edge of the training area. I could rest- at least until my heart rate and breathing returned to normal.<p>

My gaze made its way to Alec. He knocked an arrow and prepared to fire, pulling back until his knuckles brushed his ear. Releasing the bowstring the arrow flew through the air and joined the others in the middle two rings of the target. None of them were ever further out than that.

I was still worried about him. I was glad he had been convinced to train because I thought it would take his mind off things but I don't think it did. He wore the same blank, distant look he had this morning.

_He was finally quiet and I wasn't sure if it was a good thing. He was either over the fit or this was the calm before the storm._

_I couldn't deny the chance I finally had for talking to him. "Alec it's not your fault."_

_He turned his head so I could see him. His expression or lack of expression surprised me. I don't know what I expected. Maybe for it to be twisted in rage, or sunken with grief but I got a dry, dangerous look. Not even his eyes, that were in other circumstances a deep, lambent blue, had faded almost to grey._

_"Don't lie to me Isabelle." I opened my mouth to protest but couldn't bring myself to do so. I wasn't mad but that didn't mean I didn't blame him. I didn't know what to say._

_"It is my fault. I don't want you to yell at me, I don't want sympathy. I deserve to be punished. I am putting these creatures in danger so I won't get killed. No. I wouldn't be killed even. I would be banished, or maybe even just grounded and not allowed to see Magnus again._

_The last one would be the worst you know. It's because of the possibility of being kept from him that even now I don't tell the truth. I'm a coward."_

_I tried to say something comforting but my throat felt like it had closed up. He continued._

_"I deserve to be scolded. To be yelled at. I deserve to be hated by everyone in the city. I shouldn't be killed. I don't deserve an end that easy. I should be found out about and exist as a villain in wives tales. Children should be frightened if my character. Maybe in a hundred years I could be part of an expression nobody knew the meaning of. 'Wow, that persons a modern prince lightwood'."_

_Again I tried to speak. Again I failed. His face hadn't changed. It was scaring me. Even his voice was flat. Like we were having an everyday discussion about something particularly boring._

_"I deserve to be taken to the main square and maybe caged or tied to a post. People could sneer, and glare. Throw rotten food at me, or rocks. I should be beaten regularly for entertainment. I deserve to be fed the minimal amount to keep me alive. Someone would always be watching, and if I became too weak to react to the normal torments I could be whipped, just to keep up the show."_

_I realized my cheeks were streaked with tears and I had been violently shaking my head. I was relieved when I managed to find my voice. "Alec you don't deserve that." I said using the word he had so many times. "The fact you feel bad is punishment enough."_

_He looked at me and actually smiled at me a little. Like you would at a child that surprised you with a good idea._

_"Youre right. It can't get worse than this."_

_He didn't take that like I meant._

_"I deserve to have guilt and anger eat away at me. This way I'll have the worst punishment- the one I already have. I'll be forced to act like nothings wrong. Walk around normally, and smile, and laugh, and let the turmoil build up. It will be worst at night. When I'm alone, left with my thoughts and imagination. Knowing I can do nothing. Waiting. Knowing what's happening and knowing it's my fault and being slowly crushed, and weakened mentally but continuing everyday life until it becomes too much."_

_"That's not what I-" I trailed off._

_"I wonder what will happen then." Alec said referring to his last sentence, voice filled with genuine curiosity.  
><em>  
>He shot his last arrow and went to retrieve them. When he came back Jace said something and soon they were crouched facing each other.<p>

Jace threw the first punch. Alec leaned to the side and slipped around him running to the teeter totter like structure. Soon they were both on top of it advancing and retreating as it shifted with the weight change.

I noticed Alec wasn't attacking. He was defending sometimes but for the most part letting Jace beat him up. Maybe the pain helped distract him.

After a strong kick to the chest Alec tumbled off. He got up as Jace came closer and led the way to the swinging plank. Hopping on top of it he waited until Jace was close to start running. As his parabati bounded after him and reached full speed Alec leaped off leaving Jace to lose his balance and fall off ungracefully into the dirt.

Alec running away began bounding and swinging through a jungle of randomly placed pillars and bars that varied in height and size. I do admit it was one of our less creative training obstacles.

I looked up and away from my siblings. It was almost the time Alec usually left to meet Magnus. I wondered if he noticed.

When I looked back they had resumed their dangerous dance of leaping kicks and sliding dodges. All of a sudden Alec stopped and without saying a word made his way down and sprinted around the corner of the house.

Of course he noticed.

So Alecs not in the best of moods incase you couldn't tell… I hope that chap turned out better than I think it did. Review and tell me! Once again I love all of you for reading.

Heads up: I might not post next week because I think ill be on vacation and might not have acsess to a comp. sorry in advance.


	9. Chapter 9

So first things first im going to explain the last chap because apparently it was confusing. It started in isabelles room, and then skipped ahead to training. During training she had a flashback to the room. That was the italicized part. Then the flashback ended and she continued watching the boys train. I hoped that helped clear things up a little.

Also, sorry I didn't post the last two Mondays… I didn't have my computer with me .

So. Xmas has passed and I hope everyone had happy holidays. I still do not own the mortal instruments. U will know if I ever do because it would be focused on malec. For now only my ffs are.

Chapter 9 (Alec POV)

I sat with my chin on my knees under our rock in the shade, facing the direction Magnus would be coming from. On the way there I saw a few dozen of the city's troops and they were all marching in the direction of the centaur's camp, away from the elves, but that didn't keep the worry from summoning butterflies to my stomach and painting a frown onto my face.

Ya, I was worried. But that was the understatement of the century. It would be like calling oxygen important. Of course is important, it's necessary for survival, and that's what Magnus was for me. He was the rope that kept me from flying away. Other than my siblings there was nothing else in the city for me. I didn't have friends, I wasn't close to my father, (another understatement, I hate him) and if I was myself, and admitted my sexual preferences everybody would shun me. I could find another civilization to take me in, and that's what I had been planning to do despite the dangers of wandering through the uncharted forest until the first day my father had sent me to spy. I had planned to leave the night after that but stayed just one more day to see him again. And then another. And then another.

With my eyes trained on the forest I waited until a running form emerged. He was safe. I took a few deep breaths hoping I could keep myself together in front of him. As soon as I was in earshot the questioning started like I knew it would.

"What's going on?" His eyes were wide and his chest was heaving like he was out of breath from running here but his voice was steady.

"You're early." I said pretending I didn't hear him. "First time for everything huh?"

"Alec why are there nephlim in the forest?" I recognized the slang the forest folk used for our warriors, and realized I hadn't planned the answer to this inevitable question.

After trying to meet his gaze but failing as it wandered timidly around the clearing I remembered he could still be seen and wasn't safe if any of the 'nephlim' came past. "Lets get onto the rock, you'll be safer." I told him, thankful for even a little bit of time I could use to get my story together.

He nodded and I could tell he was thankful I had noticed his uncertainty. We both scrambled up, keeping our hands and feet moving fast so they wouldn't burn too badly on the hot rock. I was extremely glad I had remembered to talk my father out of the armor he had requested I wear after I first mentioned the weapons that started this. What had finally convinced him was complaining that the noise would give me away. What I was really concerned about was having my brain melt if I was confined in that heat-trapping metal.

Before I even joined him in the slightly concave part of our rock he resumed prompting me for answers.

"So, why?" Magnus was laying down so he wouldn't be seen by nephlim or his own people but I knew if he didn't have to be he would be standing over me, taking advantage of his slightly larger height, and demanding the same answers.

I thought briefly about owning up, but knew Magnus would hate me if I told him the truth, and now that I finally had a taste of what I had wanted for so long I didn't know if I would be able to handle it if he demanded I not meet him anymore. I took the easy way out, and acted like I didn't know much about what happened either. "All my father told me was that somebody had hinted that the centaurs started it. I don't know much, he won't tell me more. It's terrible, now I know why most of the forest dwellers hate us. So many false accusations. I hope you know not all of us hate you guys." I said all of this with my eyes downcast, shaking my head slightly. When I paused and looked back at Magnus he still looked angry but now had raised one eyebrow, (the way I always wished I could) in obvious disbelief. "Well most of the people other than my sister do hate you but it's not their fault. They've been taught since they were young about how horrible all of you are, and about all of the bad things you've done, most of which aren't true… but they don't know that!" I tried desperately to explain that most people didn't hate who they were, they only hated who everyone thought they were, but could see it wasn't working.

Magnus opened his mouth and I prepared myself to be yelled at. His mouth stayed open for a while but then he let out a long breath and closed it again rethinking what he was going to say. I waited and watched, relieved as his face calmed down a bit, even though I could tell he was forcing it to relax. "This is the thing Alec," he started, "I- I don't- I'm going to be honest. I hate that the nephlim are in the forest and that we…" Magnus gestured to himself and then to the surrounding trees. "haven't done anything to provoke it. But I know that you also think it's wrong. What's happening I mean. And I don't want to ruin what we have- whatever that might be- because of this."

I felt my chest tighten when Magnus continued. "And because I know you don't agree with what's happening, or have anything to do with it." I tried to look normal as I lay down next to him because if I continued standing in the sun I was just as vulnerable to being seen. "I was going to just not come today, but you don't need to be punished. No one deserves to be kept from my magnificent self." Magnus tried to lighten the mood, but I still felt like I was suffocating. I had an insane urge to tell Magnus it was me that lied to my father and caused this mess. I didn't trust myself to speak without blurting something I would regret so I just nodded for him to continue, hoping he had more to say.

He laughed to himself. "You know I never would have done this before. Not just continue seeing you, but see you at all. You know how wrong us even talking is, don't you…" He trailed off. "I haven't known you very long and I'm already risking…"

After a moment of silence I spoke, not wanting to pressure him but needing him to know that I wanted to stay. "Magnus…" But I didn't know what to say, and hoped that somehow, maybe, he got the message.

His face was blank, and it was scaring me, but I supposed it was better than twisted in rage. It was quiet for a while. I fidgeted, arching my back to give it a break from the burning rock. I was overly conscious of Magnus's body next to mine, despite the stiffness and lack of intimacy we shared last time we were here together. I hoped it wouldn't be the last time we lay together.

"Magnus I'm not saying we should ignore what's going on but I still want to see you. We can talk about our issues, including this one, but maybe our meetings could also just be to loosen up. We should still have fun, and relax. I think it would be good to have something to look forward to when everything else isn't going the best."

Magnus nodded, and stood up. "I have to get back to the village. You know, see if anything else has happened." I sat up and Magnus kissed the top of my head. I felt my heart flutter when his lips met my skin.

"Bye." I said breathlessly.

He climbed off the rock. "See you tomorrow." He called back.

As soon as he left I dropped from the high he seemed to put me on and was drenched in the guilt that had seemed to be plaguing me since I had lied to my father. This whole thing had just started and I was already asking myself when it would be over.

**Not one of my fave chaps but I had to get it done and post it because of the two weeks I didn't when I was on vacation. I should be back on my normal schedule now.** **Review?**


	10. Chapter 10

**I don't own anything from the Mortal Instruments.**

**This is a pretty short chapter. I was going to combine this and the next one but it would have been long and im not even done with the next one so…enjoy.**

It had been eleven days since the nephlim had first ventured into the forest. _Hmmm, nephlim. I didn't even feel weird calling them that anymore._ Magnus and I didn't actually see any of them at our meetings for the first four or five of those days but they steadily became more commonly spotted.

Over at the centaur camp things were getting crazier. I had taken to checking on the situation there before I saw Magnus daily partly out of actually wanting to know what was going on and partially so I would have something to tell my exceedingly impatient father. From what I had seen myself and heard from Magnus the centaurs were in trouble right away because they took great joy in sports that included items that could be easily mistaken as and used as weapons such as javelin throws, their own bow and arrow system, (which had so far been used only for target practice) and other various dangerous sounding sports I hadn't heard of. Needless to say, even without their obsession with blacksmithing, which left behind many decorative axes and swords, it would be hard to convince an army they had nothing planned.

On the first day, before there was even a chance to explain themselves, a rash soldier named Sebastion, who I later discovered was the man my father had put in command of the main war decisions, had murdered an elderly centaur after she stepped in front of her grandson when he tried to stand up for his people. Since then twenty more had died, plus three fairy's that couldn't escape when Sebastion and his soldiers cut down the oak they had been living in to make room for a camp the nephlim would be occupying until this was over with.

No deaths had occurred in Magnus's village yet, the only time any of the soldiers even visited was to question them about the centaurs and search for any 'mysterious objects' that the elves may have possessed. Much to Magnus's (and the rest of the village's) dismay though, the bows and arrows they used for hunting and work knives that were traditionally used to cut meat and other difficult-to-tear things were considered suspicious and confiscated, leaving the village defenseless and without their main food source.

The only species that lived around here that continued to be for the most part unaffected were the nymphs who had taken to dissolving into plants (which apparently they could do) whenever the nephlim were in sight. I didn't even know if the soldiers knew they existed… I certainly didn't until Magnus told me some were watching the other day from a couple trees at the edge of the clearing as he kissed me, at which I of course pulled away, blushing furiously.

"Alec, come on. You're the one that said we should use our meetings as a way to relax and take a break from our thoughts on the war." I blinked rapidly, encouraging my thoughts to make their way back to what was happening now. I realized Magnus prodding my bicep painfully I put my hand between his fingertips and my arm so he was hitting the back of my hand instead.

"Okay, okay, I'm sorry! It's just there's not much to do when for both of us to be safe we have to lay here. If you have a reasonable proposition for what else to do I will gladly accept the distraction."

He finally stopped poking me and thought for a second. "Fine. Meet me here tonight at moon high. Then we can move around and have fun. You will be able use your shadowhunter abilities to stay unseen and it will be less likely I'm seen- just in general because less people will be up and about, and the darkness will make it easier to hide if need be." Magnus looked at me expectantly awaiting my approval of his plan. I briefly wondered if he was kidding. It would be too risky, and being caught could result horribly.

"No Magnus." He looked at me, obviously astounded by my tone. "Have you suffered a recent blow to the head? Do you know what could happen?"

"Yes." He said flatly.

I shook my head in bewilderment. "Then why did you even suggest it?"

His eyes met mine and he made sure I wouldn't look away from the green-gold vortexes before answering. "Because it would be worth it to spend more time with you, especially if it would be different than all of these past days where all I can do is watch you space out. The reward of actually having your attention outweighs the dangers it would risk." He got up as he finished and was standing on the edge of the boulder."

I was at a loss for words. How was I supposed to respond to that? "Bu-but I…I…We-we could…" Before I found something decent to say he spoke again.

"I will be here. I hope I'll have company. Moon high." And then he lowered himself so he was hanging by a crack in the stone and dropped down. I scrambled to the edge preparing to convince him what a bad idea this was but he was already gone.

**Ok so that's that. Thank you to every one that's still reading this. Review?**


	11. Chapter 11

**Sorry this is up so late. As im typing this I actually don't know when this chap will be up, jus that it will be late. My internet is jacked up so I need to fix that and im spending all my free time studying for finals soooo…. Anyway I hope you guys enjoy this when it is up. Its longer than normal and hopefully makes up for tardyness**

**This is another one of those chapters where its hard to remember there are no lights or times. I said 'a moon' instead of 'a month' because I don't think they have weeks and months and years and I had to stop myself from saying 'a few seconds later' and things like that… I don't own anything except the plot.**

**Quick recap- magnus asked alec to meet him at midnight (moonhigh) and then left w/out an answer**

Chap 11 (alec POV)

I sat with my head hanging pulling methodically at the hair on the back of my head. It seemed to be a newly acquired stress based habit. Isabelle had been trying to get me to stop, exclaiming I would be bald by the next full moon, but like most other bad habits half the time I didn't even realize I was doing it.

I dropped my arms and rested my wrists on my knees. Studying my hands I saw that my fingernails had also taken a beating since I began biting them more frequently after the war started. Not much of me hadn't. My mind was definitely the biggest victim though as the situation brought on guilt and anger and grief that I couldn't let out in public. Sure, in my room I was a mess, screaming into pillows, punching anything I could reach, banging my head against the wall, but in front of any family (other than Isabelle) I was supposed to be glad this was happening, and in public, being the prince, I always had to act optimistic no matter what was tearing me up inside. That's why I didn't go out other than to meet Magnus- because of that unrealistically large smiley mask that couldn't leave my face when I was. That was something I just couldn't deal with, especially right now.

There were too many skeletons in the closet, to many decisions and bottled up feelings to even try to pretend were nonexistent. A dull pounding had started in the back of my head. I felt like I spent more time with headaches than without these days. I know they would go away if I relaxed and stopped thinking so hard, but that was something I couldn't do. I had tried to take the easy way out and distract myself but nothing would go away. The same questions and doubts and worries would roll through my head, each one would stay long enough to frustrate me, but be replaced before I could decide on something to do about it.

The most frequently occurring group of thoughts was what my brain was trying to pain me with now. _Oh god, I started a war. All of the casualties will be ultimately my fault. What if Magnus got hurt. Should I tell him it was me? _And then came the most recent of questions added to the towering pile. _Should I go see Magnus tonight?_

This one was a problem… not that any of them weren't. There was no way I could go, it was too stupid, too dangerous. There was also no way I could stand Magnus up, and possibly hurt him. Ultimately: No winning. My mind started to drift again but I pushed it back on track, knowing I had to decide. I winced as the dull pain from the back of my head became a sharp one that resembled what I imagined lightning would feel like if it shot through my head from one temple to the other.

I padded as softly as I could manage down the steps and toward the back door, which would be much quieter than the huge banging double front doors or the creaky side door. I carefully maneuvered the small candle I carried so that it was above my head keeping my left hand a shadow directly underneath it to catch the drops of wax that were already sliding down the sides.

Many might find this precaution unnecessary but if they knew my mother personally, or even paid attention to their queen when she was in public would know a stray drop of candle wax where it wouldn't normally be would not go unnoticed. By the time I had reached the door and slipped outside, jumping at the click of the door closing, the wax didn't even hit my hand any more, it just settled on the thin layer already drying on my palm. I sighed in relief, thankful the burning droplets wouldn't be hitting my skin anymore.

As soon as I was around to the front I blew out the candle and set it down in some high grass, trying to hide it but keeping it somewhere I could easily find it again. I passed a hand through my hair before I started walking again. I wasn't even off my property and this already had my heart racing. _This is not a good idea._ My brain told me for the millionth time. It told me to go back and sleep. It asked me if it was worth the risk. Despite the major effort my common sense was using to try and stop me something else was pulling harder. I didn't know what it was but it was impossible to resist, all I knew was I hadn't felt it before Magnus.

Although I didn't feel like it, I was virtually safe now. After I had been able to blow the candle when I reached the road, not needing it like I had in the back yard to avoid craters, stones, and training equipment that was strewn about, I became invisible to almost everybody. When I neared the end of our superfluously long front yard I saw the flickering lights of candles in the city shops that never seemed to close.

Avoiding the main roads that were still occupied by the night dwellers (mostly kids my age up to no good, and scavenging homeless) and taking the back alleys took longer than I thought it would and by the time I reached the first copse of trees the moon was directly above me. Realizing I should already be at the clearing and that I would be significantly late I started running, hoping Magnus wouldn't think I wasn't coming when I didn't arrive on time.

After stumbling, and tripping, and scraping myself up, and narrowly missing quite a few trees, I arrived at the clearing, and made a mental note not to ever try and run through a forest at night again. My gaze raked across the clearing. I initially saw only the pond and the boulder and trees, but noMagnus. I worried he had left already but soon I saw a shadow moving on top of the rock and heard his voice asking if it was me.

"Yeah." I said.

The dark blob chuckled. "Good, because I would be kind of screwed if it were somebody else. I'm glad you came Alec. I was starting to worry you wouldn't show." _How could Magnus be so calm about all of this? _I walked toward the rock planning to climb on top like I always did but as I neared the base he poked his head over again. "Nope, off limits Mr. Lightwood." He lowered himself gracefully down next to me using a series of crevices and chips in the rock I didn't think I would be able to fit my fingers in. "There would be no point in meeting at night if we just stayed on that damn rock like we always have to."

I tilted my head a bit, trying to show my confusion. "Then what will we do. Sit on the ground instead? Seems like a small improvement."

"We aren't going to be sitting around at all." Before I reiterated my question of '_what will we do_' Magnus had turned and was walking away from me. I thought of questioning him or following him but figured I would find out what he was doing faster if I just let him do it.

I watched as he pulled his shirt over his head and tossed it at the ground next to the rock. I felt blood rush to my face as I took in the smooth caramel expanse of skin. I tried to pull my gaze away from his rolling shoulder blades and the perfectly curved small of his back but found myself unable to do so. I somehow found my voice. "Magnus what-" I heard it crack and cleared my throat. "What are you doing?" He didn't answer, just turned looked over him shoulder at me and winked before turning away again. I stared shamelessly at the small dimples that were visible just above the waistline of his pants and then gasped as his thumbs slid past his hips and his pants slid to the ground too, and he threw them to join his shirt.

"Magnus!" I gasped when he did this. I couldn't help but admire his ass as he stood, like it was perfectly normal, in nothing but his tight undershorts that only reached mid-thigh. He turned to me again and finally answered as my gazed snapped guiltily up to his face and I tried to cover up the growing problem in my pants.

"Well I don't want to get my clothes wet." I opened my mouth to ask what he could possibly mean by that when he took off running away from me again and started splashing into the pond. He was about waist deep when he turned fully around to face me smiling. He waited expectantly for me to join him but I only questioned him again.

"Why are you in there? You're going to freeze! How do you know there aren't dangerous fish in there? Get out. If someone came now you would have nowhere to hide!"

He stared at me. "I'm safe."

Okay that was definitely not true. And this was insane, even for Magnus. "No. You're not safe. You haven't been safe for more than half a moon, since the war started."

"Okay," he countered. "But I'm not any less safe than I would be if I wasn't in the water right now, and the water isn't very cold. I'm pretty sure it's warmer than the air at the moment. And I'm in here because it's fun, and I want to have fun, and I want you to have fun." He demonstrated by splashing around with his hands. "I feel like that's something you definitely don't get enough of."

I shook my head, not able to conceive what was happening. After I didn't move or talk for a while Magnus sighed and although I couldn't see I knew he rolled his eyes. He waded back toward me and I thought I had won, but it was short lived when he came up, grabbed my arm, and started dragging me toward the water.

After my brain switched from focusing on the tingles sent up my arm from where the nearly naked man was touching me to the fact said man was dragging me into a filthy pond I started trying to free myself. When we were a few strides away from where the dark water was lapping the shore I voiced the first viable reason I couldn't go in. "Magnus my clothes will be ruined."

As soon as he spoke I realized my mistake. He let go but made sure I was still close enough to grab if I tried to run. "Then take them off."

"No! Anyone could walk by and see me." I crossed my arms over my chest. Magnus started pushing me to the water again. "Fine!" I said knowing I would end up in the water either way, and that soaked, muddy clothes would be hard to explain when I got home. Magnus stopped pushing but didn't let go. "Magnus…" He stepped away and gestured for me to get going. When I didn't undress he raised his eyebrows, obviously wondering what I was waiting for. "Could you not watch?"

This time I could see as he rolled his eyes but he said "I won't look until you tell me you are in the water."

"Thank you." I said as he stepped back and covered his eyes dramatically before turning away.

"Just hurry up Alec, it's cold."

I nervously pulled my shirt over my head and put it by Magnus's, and then my pants. Soon I was wading into the water in only my baggy underwear and checking over my shoulder to make sure he didn't peek while wondering how the hell he persuaded me to do this.

**I also had trouble deciding on how to describe their clothes because I knew they would have them but don't know what they're made of and obviously there aren't jeans and brands and things so im just going to be vague unless one of you gives me a good idea for specifics**

**Ok- next chap will be them swimming and stuff… thank you as always for reading and as always please review.**


	12. Chapter 12

**I know this is late and im sorry but ive been busy with track and school and I went camping over the weekend but here it is. I nice fluffy chapter to make up for my absence. **

**Disclaimer: you should know by now that I own nothing.**

Chapter 12 (Magnus POV)

I waited impatiently for Alec to finish undressing. Why was that boy so self-conscious? I knew the basic shape of his body already just from admiring when his mind took those frequent trips to space, and from what I could make out beneath the fabric he should be showing off, not hiding. Outlines through the clothing were like a mocking taste of what there really was hiding beneath and I had made it my goal to see just exactly what that was.

The shuffling behind me headed in the direction of the water and soon became splashes. I crossed my arms diligently waiting to be allowed to join him.

"Okay Magnus, you can turn around." When I did turn I let out a breath in disappointment. He had definitely taken full advantage of my willingness to be a gentleman. Alec was up to his neck in the water and was standing awkwardly looking uncomfortable. I had hoped he would show _something_, maybe only go waste deep, or to mid-chest. I can't say I was surprised though. Originally I expected him to opt for going in fully clothed, but at this point it didn't matter what he was or wasn't wearing because he was buried to his chin in water.

I didn't waste any time making my way out of the cold wind and back into the surprisingly warm water. Not that it was really warm, it just felt like it compared to the slight chill that joined the air at night despite the ridiculous daytime heat of summer. Once I was waist deep in the water I fell forward and actually swam to Alec appreciating the feel of the relatively clean water on my skin.

I knew he was watching me when I flipped over and back paddled making sure I kept as much of my chest as I could above the water. I stopped stroking when I got close enough and let my momentum float me the remaining distance before standing up about a foot away from him. The water that was lapping the bottom of his chin was just covering my shoulders. Neither of us spoke, just looked at each other for a while. It wasn't awkward but not completely relaxed either. Then after a while- long enough for the wakes cause by our movement to settle I pulled my arm back and cupped my hand and swung it back at the water splashing him, knowing he wouldn't expect it.

He wiped at his eyes surprised. "What was that for?" he demanded annoyed.

"We came here to have fun." I responded unfazed by his lack of sportsmanship when it came to taking a splash in the face and feeling like I had dramatically overused the word 'fun' this evening.

"You could have warned me." He mumbled grumpily. Alec continued to rub at his eyes but I assumed it was more for show now then for clearing them of water.

"That wouldn't have been fun." I said flatly using the 'f' word again.

Suddenly a stream of water hit my left cheek and neck. I blinked a few times quickly trying to clear out the drops that landed higher up in my own eyes. It was hard enough to see in the semidarkness without that. It would be almost impossible if the moon wasn't nearly full like it was tonight. I blindly splashed in the direction my attacker had stuck from but he wasn't there. I spun my head around trying to figure out where he went. I heard an intake of breath and turned to see him surface from underwater near the center of the lake.

"You're right, I did enjoy that." He mocked. I swam after him closing most of the distance quickly but when I was about a body length away he ducked under the water again. I stopped frustrated and waited for him to come up expecting he ran away again. When hands gripped my ankles and pulled my head underwater I thrashed and most likely kicked him a few times. It only took a few seconds for my lungs to start burning as I had been too surprised to take a breath before going under. He tugged me down a little further and let go, not meaning any harm.

When I broke surface and gasped for air he was already there and grinning wickedly. I took some more deep breaths and blinked my eyes a few times. "I scared you." Alec taunted amused.

"Pshh, no." I defended weakly.

"You," he said. "are a horrible liar."

"Well you didn't scare me…startled maybe." I said.

He was about to speak again but I reached out my arms and pushed him down by the top of his head. Right when I was confidant I had achieved the upper hand Alec grabbed my wrist and knowing he would be able to overpower me I took a breath in preparation. Soon I was below him not sure how I got there and he was pushing off my back with his feet, successfully resurfacing and knocking me into the lake floor.

When we were both above water again I swam closer to shore where I could stand realizing despairingly that I was losing this battle and thanks to his greater strength I wouldn't be able to turn it around.

(Alec POV)

When Magnus swam toward shore I followed him not planning on letting him run away just because he was losing whatever game this was. I closed in but when I was preparing to splash him again or pull him back he turned around and our faces collided. He was kissing me and I knew Magnus was only trying to distract me from the game. I knew I should pull away and not let him get away with this but I couldn't. This was different from the few other kisses we shared had been. Those were short and our lips barely touched. Closed mouthed and romantic, but right now his lips were smashed against mine and I was completely conscious of the nearness and unclothed state of our bodies.

I felt him lessen the force of the kiss when he was convinced I wouldn't stop it but all the passion was still there. Our lips parted for a second and he tilted his head before eagerly closing in on my mouth again. I moved my lips against his and my hands went to his shoulders. His fingers trailed down my sides and I shivered letting the tingling feeling left behind take over me. When they got to the waistline of my underwear he brought them back up still dragging against my skin and then his hands fell to my hips.

I felt his tongue trace my lips and opened my mouth hesitantly, feeling it was the right thing to do. I moaned when I felt the warmth of Magnus's tongue in my mouth. It moved to trace the back of my teeth and I pushed against with my own eliciting a sound of pleasure from Magnus. The hands on my waist moved around to my back as he pulled my body against his own. I felt my body ignite with sparks when so much or our skin met and fully enjoyed the smooth feeling of his lean frame against mine but pushed him back anyway.

When our mouths separated and I held him at an arms length, hands still on his shoulders he looked at me confused. Desire still illuminated his eyes and it took all I had to stand there with him that close touching him and not continue where we had left off. "What is it?" Magnus asked.

I swallowed before answering hoping my voice would be stable. "We're in our underwear Magnus. I'm not comfortable doing this especially with so little clothing on."

I studied his expression but couldn't see well enough in the dark to make out much of his face. "Are you uncomfortable touching me shirtless or uncomfortable with me touching you?" I wasn't prepared for that question.

"Uh, the latter I guess." I responded. I was scared he would be disappointed with what he discovered I looked like when he was so perfect.

"Alec, don't be self-conscious. You are the most beautiful man I've ever seen. What do you of all people have to be nervous about?" He placed a hand on my chest and I flinched a bit but refrained from moving away. It dragged down my stomach and around to my back as he pulled me in for a hug. "You're strong," Magnus stated. "You should be proud of all those muscles." He was whispering in my ear now. "They are unbelievably sexy…" He trailed off and began kissing down my jaw before returning his attention to right below my ear and sucking at it. I groaned at the feeling and tilted my head back allowing access to the remainder of my neck.

After he had been kissing and licking around my collar bone for a while I grabbed his head unable to hold back any more. I shoved my own tongue into his open mouth and unsure what to do moved it around aimlessly. A humming noise escaped his throat vibrating through my mouth and I pushed at the small of his back in an impossible attempt to bring us closer than we were.

Eventually I pulled away for breath and looked at his and seeing a smile pulling at his lips. He leaned in, kissed me again, and receded from the water. As Magnus pulled his clothes back on he looked over at me. "Aren't you coming? We have to go."

I looked nervously at him. "Will you turn around?"

He looked at me incredulously. "Really? After all that?"

I thought about it and realized I was being ridiculous. After a pause said, "I guess not." I walked out of the water into the cold air with my arms crossed across my abdomen partially for warmth but not minding the excuse to cover more of myself up. I felt my face heat up and knew I was blushing when Magnus began shamelessly checking me out.

I briskly took the few strides over to the remaining pile of fabric. My under shorts were soaked and I debated taking them off before redressing but quickly dismissed the idea when I remembered I had company.

When I finished and turned back to Magnus he raised his eyebrows and wolf whistled, still not hiding the fact he had been staring. "I have no idea what you were trying to hide Alexander." I couldn't help but smile bashfully at the comment and kiss him one more time before saying good night.

**This chapter seemed kind of quick to me but I admit ive never had very long chapters and I could have drawn this out more but that probably wouldn't have been finished for a while so I posted it like this. It is still my goal to post every Monday and I will try to do that but I doubt it will be happening, at least for a little while. Please review!**


	13. Chapter 13

**Alright I know its been a long time again but I cant start apologizing at the beginning of every chapter. I know my excuses are lame and that a lot of people have school and work and other activities but I want you guys to know I am busy and not just blowing you off…I actually should probably be writing a research report right now but I would much rather write this. Anyway I still don't own anything and heres the chapter.**

Chapter 13 (Alec POV) (A few weeks after night meeting.)

I observed the trees bordering our clearing quietly from the shallow dip on the top of the rock for longer than usual, waiting for Magnus. I had become accustom to his tardiness- he had never been to focused on being prompt but despite trying to calm my nagging thoughts I worried he was mad at me for not showing up the day before. My father had scheduled for Isabelle, Jace, and I to train this afternoon. This happened quite often and I would go in the beginning and make sure he saw me there but after he left to do whatever a king does, I found myself ditching lately more often than not to meet with Magnus. The reason yesterday was different was because he had stayed through the whole thing wanting to confirm (for my mothers sake, not because he gave a damn about us anyway) our readiness for the upcoming war, not because we would be fighting in it but just incase something did happen it was requested we be able to handle ourselves. By the time it ended my father seemed satisfied but the sun was beginning to set and the opportunity had far passed for a forest meeting.

My thoughts drifted back to the present and I willed the soft lapping of the small wind formed waves on the lake and the chirping of birds to calm me. The stone under me was no longer uncomfortably hot and the warm air was balanced by the occasional cool breeze that ruffled freely through the trees. It was difficult to stay worried surrounded by the serenity of this place but somehow I managed to fret unceasingly that Magnus would show up angry at me, or worse, not at all.

Soon I saw a familiar shape step out of the dense growth. The slight concern that had formed in the back of my mind when he was later than usual amplified when I could see him more clearly. The head I had only ever seen held high was hanging, the strut of a walk had degraded to a depressed shuffle, and the carefully groomed hair was hanging mussed and tangled from his head. Immediately the thoughts of his ire were taken away. This was obviously not caused by my absence and at this point I was more concerned than ever about what had happened.

After I overcame the initial shock of seeing the usually spirited Magnus so gloomy I scrambled down from the rock and aided him in his ascent, worrying he would hurt himself now that his movements lacked their customary graceful rhythm.

Once I had him safely atop of our boulder I pondered what to do next. Of course I wanted to drown him in a tsunami of questions, but that seemed inconsiderate, and Magnus had yet to say anything. He had his knees pulled up to his chest and was staring at the water. My gaze swept across the surrounding trees. When he was sitting up Magnus would be fully visible to any passerby but I didn't have the heart to remind him so. His legs were pulled to his chest with his arms wrapped around the shins, chin on his knees. He was facing the water but had a distant look in his eyes, as if he were looking past the surface to some mysterious land only he could see that hid in its depths.

Whatever was going through his mind had all his attention and gave me a chance to study him, more so than I probably ever had prior. Magnus had a young face. The only imperfections were the creases between his brows that hadn't formed until now. His eyes were half hooded as he looked down but I could still just see the iridescent green-gold irises that I had learned to love. My gaze drifted past smooth skin to a mouth that looked like it had been removed and then replaced upside-down. The full lips that always seemed to be quirked upwards were now drooping, and the rosy color seemed somehow faded. I continued admiring different parts of him that usually slipped my notice- they strong jaw and just-angular-enough features. The curve of his girlishly long eyelashes and shape of his nose. The perfect arch of his dark brow and slight indentation at his temples. All of these things I regarded with a detached interest, not for the first time thinking I wasn't good enough for him. What I really noticed subconsciously as I did this were the differences in his face today. His ivory skin looked paler and his eyes shone with what I suspected would soon be tears.

He turned his so his cheek replaced his chin on his knees. His eyes met mine and I surprised myself by not looking away but instead searching them for answers. Magnus's gaze was steady and he waited for me to ask the inevitable question. "What's wrong?" I asked blatantly. My eyes seemed glued to his and I found myself unable to look away until he turned his head back to the water.

His answer was to the point and void of the emotion I would have expected. "Ragner's dead." I absorbed this wordlessly remembering Ragner as the friend of Magnus's that I used to be jealous of. He continued. "That's why I wasn't here yesterday. Sorry."

So he wasn't here yesterday either. I thought about telling him I had had to stay home also but decided against it feeling that the explanation was now unnecessary and unimportant and also that somehow I was one of the only constants in his life and admitting my absence now would just be like taking one more thing away from him. "That's terrible. What happened?" I responded realizing afterward he probably didn't want to talk about it and would have already told me the answer to that question if he did.

Magnus didn't seem offended and replied readily. "When I got back the day before yesterday he was in the infirmary. Apparently the soldiers came earlier that day. It must have been right after I left to meet you because everyone described it as midday. When they arrived they claimed the centaurs told them we were hiding weapons, and were convinced it was us elves that were planning the attack on their…your city." He said the last part as if he had forgotten I wasn't a forest creature, that I might know some of these people and that my father controls them. That I some day will control them.

I felt a sudden urge to defend myself but bit my tongue before I tried; reminding myself again that it was my lie that started this in the first place. That this whole war was more my fault than any other individuals. "They tried to convince the soldiers that this wasn't true but they didn't believe it…After that they started fighting. Because the Elves obviously didn't have weapons besides the bows and spears we use to hunt the result of the skirmish was predictable."

Magnus's face was finally starting to show the emotion he had so far bottled up. He had a hard time continuing and his voice was cracking but he took a deep breath and managed to finish. "He was hurt towards the end, badly- the fatal wound was a punctured lung. The medics couldn't keep him alive very long. He kept trying to talk to me and I told him to stop because he was hurting himself but he kept trying. It was terrible because he kept choking and gasping and couldn't get enough air. I couldn't help him… I hated not being able to help him and…" Magnus's speech was broken by a sob but he seemed hysterical now and unable to stop talking. "And he kept trying to tell me something but couldn't talk and I knew just being there was making it worse for him because I don't think he would have struggled so hard to say something to anyone else and, and…"

I shushed Magnus and scooted behind him. He released his legs so his knees bent over the edge of the boulder and I wrapped my arms around his waist while whispering what I hoped were comforting things to him. His body racked with sobs and I held him close not knowing what to say and hoping he didn't mind my muteness.

He finally settled down and his crying became silent he leaned back into me. As I place my chin on his shoulder he spoke again. "I was there when he died…I was holding him…"

**Well im not gonna lie that was kinda depressing to write. Im hoping the emotion transferred in my writing, but its hard to stay sad right now because im seeing the hunger games in four hours with my friends and im sooooo excited! AND adam lamberts new album has an official release date AND theres only like two months until the next tmi book so…ya happy day. AND THIS IS NOW KATIE POST SEEING HUNGER GAMES AND IT WAS AMAZING! THEY DID BETTER THAN I THOUGHT THEY WOULD AT FOLLOING THE STORY IN THE BOOK.**

**Thank you to everybody that's still reading. I appreciate your support.**

**Review for Ragner.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Okay I know its been forever since I posted last and im a terrible person yada yada yada but idk I haven't been feeling angsty latly so this chap was hard to get inspiration for so if its as terrible as I think it is I appologize. Plus ive had extra things taking up my time lately… like along with track and school my dog got sick and needed surgery and ive had to watvh him like constantly… poor baby… anyway no that ive complained to you guys…yay I finally posted! Is what we should focus on.**

**I just realized that I don't even remember what happened last chapter so I am going to review the important things.**

**IMPORTANT/RECENT EVENTS IN STORY: people have different powers. Alec is a shadowhunter. Shadowhunters cant be seen in shadows. Magnus can see through powers. Magnus is an elf. The forest creatures and alecs city are at war. Alecs dad is king. Ragner just died. **

**I don't own the mortal instrments(did you expect me to?) **

Chapter 14 (Alec POV)

As the sun began to set I pulled Magnus closer to me, relishing his warmth as it battled the renewed chill that seemed to weigh down on the surrounding air. The clicks and buzzes of insects rang through the otherwise silent forest. Magnus shifted against me and I scooted backward allowing him to reposition himself more comfortably. He flattened himself against the stone, eliminating at least one of the worries, even if it may have been a minor one compared to everything else that's going on, from my mind. We had been lucky nobody happened to wander past when we sat foolishly unprotected on the edge of the boulder. Though I was a Shadowhunter and would be unnoticed by a common passerby I joined him on my stomach, accepting the warmth the rock retained now that Magnus was no longer heating me.

I lay close to him, but not quite touching. I glanced warily at the sun. It was less than half visible and sinking quickly. I knew I should start heading home soon, Isabelle was tired of making excuses for my absence and I knew she would already be explaining another ludicrous situation that might excuse my late return again. I would be in such bad shape if I didn't have Isabelle, who had as little respect for my father as I had, and seemed almost more excited than I was myself every time I told her I was meeting Magnus.

I let my head fall so I was facing him, planning on saying goodbye and making my way home but when I did I saw him looking at me with a look of uncertainty and determination in his eyes. He spoke before I had the chance to. "Do you want to know the rest of the story of what happened to my parents?"

"Only if you want to tell me." I responded not wanting him to feel forced into something so personal especially when he was as emotional as he was now and knowing I should go home but also wanting to know.

"I do." Magnus said as our eyes met. His gaze left mine shortly to focus on something visible only to him. It returned to mine before its presence was missed and he began. "I already told you some of it right? Like how my mom was part elf, but it wasn't possible to tell from looking? And how my dad went off to war and didn't figure out until he got back about my mothers ancestry or my inheritance of the ancestry? That's where we left off, right?" Magnus seemed unnaturally calm about this. I nodded and studied him as he looked away again.

"Well when he got home and found out my mother and I were both part elf he-" Magnus cleared his throat. "He got really mad. He didn't let her explain. When we got back home from the train station I watched him kill her. Not even an hour after he got home." Magnus still wasn't crying, or even showing any sign of miserable feeling that I would have thought to be evident. "I just watched from the doorway. It wasn't slow, or torturous. He just hit her once and then slit her throat."

"He was on his knees after that and my mothers' blood was pooling around him. He looked at me with a deranged expression. I looked back at him wide-eyed as I took in what happened. 'I do love her.' He said, as if she weren't lying dead in front of her, and she was just out somewhere and he was awaiting her return. 'That's why I know that wasn't her.' My father nodded to himself, as he convinced himself we weren't really his family. He was going crazy. 'Filthy elves could never be related to me. That's how I know you're not my son.' Then I turned and ran. I knew eventually he would get up and come at me. I ran for the distant forest hoping I could hide there. I slept in trees for two nights and cried through most of the days. I didn't miss my father because I didn't know him very well, but my mother I did miss. I didn't know many people. She was the only person I was really close to ever."

"When Ragner found me I was half starved and dehydrated. He brought me to the village and they took me in. That's how I ended up here." He thought about what he'd said for a moment, eyes still fixed on a point in the distance. "Its not as complicated a story as I always thought of it as."

He turned to me and wet his lips, still with an unchanged expression on his face. "How are you so relaxed about this?" I asked incredulous.

"I never have been before. I think it's because I've always been reminded of how alone I am when I tell it. Ragner was my only friend and we weren't even that close. It forced me to think about all of the childish fears I still had about not ever really being accepted or loved and believing I couldn't ever trust or love anybody."

"Why is it better now? Wouldn't it be worse now that Ragner's dead?" I didn't know Magnus still had such a bad life- he always seemed to be an upbeat kind of person.

Magnus smiled warmly. "Well that's because I proved myself wrong. Proved all my fears wrong."

"How's that?" I asked, still confused.

"Because I found someone I love. I was scared of it at first. The feelings I had for you were so unexplored and uncommon and it took me a while to get used to them, but now I'm happier than I have been since that day. It's nice having someone to confide in. I trust you Alec. It feels good to be able to trust someone again."

It took me a second to comprehend what he said. I felt my eyes widen and his smile grew at my reaction. "Did-did you just say you love me?"

Magnus was chuckling now. I blinked and tried to put an indifferent expression on my face, which humored him more. "Not directly." He said, "But ya, I suppose I did."

My mouth fell open and after a few seconds he nudged my jaw back up. I closed it and stared at him as adrenaline coursed trough my body and thoughts flew through my mind so fast they blurred together. Magnus loved me. He raised an eyebrow. "So? Do you feel the same?"

I debated how to answer this. Then I said,"No."

His face fell and his shoulders drooped. The bright green eyes looked away from me and this time tears did begin to appear. I quickly restated my answer. "I mean I can't… I-I shouldn't. It's not allowed. I have responsibilities as prince and all-"

Magnus interrupted. "I understand." He said eyes still downcast. "I just thought…" he trailed off.

"No Magnus! I said I shouldn't. It's forbidden, and wrong, but no matter how hard I tried not to I do."

He looked back at me, rubbing at his eyes. "You do what?" A contained hope showed in his expression.

"I do love you." I whispered. He swallowed thickly and I pushed aside the consequences of what I admitted. He leaned forward to kiss me.

It was slow and closed mouthed and romantic and despite our challenges I couldn't keep myself from smiling against his lips.

He pulled back grinning and I thought about what he'd said again. _"Because I found someone I love. I was scared of it at first. The feelings I had for you were so unexplored and uncommon and it took me a while to get used to them, but now I'm happier than I have been since that day. It's nice having someone to confide in. I trust you Alec. It feels good to be able to trust someone again."_

I felt the guilt wash over me. The guilt I had forgotten until now I should have. He trusted me. I was the only person he had to trust. He confided in me with a story he'd kept to himself for years and all the while I've been starting wars and not taking any credit for my irresponsibility.

He was still grinning at me and I forced myself to smile. I could be happy, I would let myself be happy for now.

"Magnus I hate to do this now but I have to go home. My family will worry."

He nodded. "I know."

We dismounted the boulder and he walked to the edge of the clearing with me. I leaned in to kiss me again and my chest swelled with glee. He looked down at me with more feeling than he could express with words and it mirrored how I felt. An invisible string still tugged gently at the corners of his mouth. "Definitely nice to trust someone again." He said.

I looked away, not having faith in myself to convincingly maintain the look of bliss that had surly been engraved in my face a minute ago. "See you tomorrow." I said, and without looking back at him I jogged into the woods toward the waiting crowds of the city. Soon, I thought. I had to tell him soon.

**Okay so that was a little lighter than I planned it to be but I couldn't find it in myself to be angsty today, and it was longer than most of my chapters are and I hope it wasn't bad. **

**City of Lost Souls is coming out tomorrow! Im soooooooooooo excited :D and then on the 15****th**** trespassing- Adam Lamberts next album. Yay happy things.**

**Anyway guys tell me if you liked it and whether alec should tell magnus the truth soon. Please review. I hate when people request reviews to post the next chap so I don't like doing that but reviews and faves and alerts really do inspire me. I like to know what you guys think and if my work is appreciated. It only takes a few seconds **


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